Malaysian Air Lines Forking Over The Cash:

     CNN: "Malaysia Airlines said Tuesday it has offered family members $5,000 for each passenger aboard the ill-fated Flight 370 and was preparing to make additional payments as the prolonged search continues."



Lee Matthews: "Wow, gee, uh thanks!  Uh, my husband pulled down triple digits each year keeping our three kids fed and in school, was on his way home from a meeting with your government on better ways to purify water for orphans in your country.  But 5k?  Yeah, that will make everything better!  Now, where did I put my lawyer's phone number?"